A Geishas Blessing
by lizziekiss
Summary: What happens when Logan meets Shoko? will he remember who he used to be? will he remember the love they used to share? or will the demons from his past resurface and ruin everything? Rated M for mature content and violence. CURRENTLY ON HIATUS
1. The Introduction

A/N- Please excuse the vague-ness and the slow beginning but i assure you that it will get better. I am currently looking for a beta for this story so please message me if that intrests you!

Also: i do not own any of the x-men characters, i do however own Shoko, she is mine, made from my own imagination! enjoy!

"There he is" a nervous looking woman in a kimono said aloud as she watched a man and a small child in the distance. The man was, kneeling down next to a small girl about four or five years old. He was showing her how to throw a small firecracker, just right, so that it exploded as it hit the ground; ensuring the biggest explosion and the most sparks.

"Light it. Then count to three. One, two, three, now throw it lightly," he said. 

It was the Chinese New Year in Westchester New York, during a small block party event.

A bald man in a motorized wheelchair came up beside the woman in the kimono and asked, "What's wrong? Is there anything I can do to help?"

"No sir, unless you can give me courage" she turned to the bald man and gave him a sad look.

"Well miss, what's your name?"

"My name is Shoko."

"My name is Charles Xavier, please have a seat," he said motioning to the bench beside him. Shoko sat carefully so she would not ruin her kimono. Xavier spoke again "why do you need courage?"

"I've spent many years looking for my husband, there was a fight, and I was told he was dead, but I knew in my heart that he was still alive. I went to look for him, and now that I have found him, I do not have the courage to confront him, to show him that my life's work is completed. I've spent a life time searching for him, most times arriving a moment too late and a step behind, but this time he's close enough to touch."

"Do you still love this man?"

"With all my heart and soul."

Shoko removed an old weathered piece of paper from her sleeve and handed it to Xavier. "I've read it so many times I couldn't forget the words if I tried" Xavier opened the paper and began to read:

When you find this, I will be gone and I am sorry. However, I want you to wear this necklace until I return. It is a good luck charm, and a memento of my love for you. I will find you again.

Love,

Logan

"Logan? That is whom you were watching? Logan?" as Xavier spoke a look of shock came over his face.

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

"I'm sorry Shoko, it's just that normally when some one is looking for Logan they want to kill him, not rekindle a long lost love. How long ago were you two married?"

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you"

"I can see it in your heart, I'm so sorry that all these events had to bring you here. Am I right in assuming that you're a mutant?"

"Yes Xavier, I have probability control. I honed my skills, trained day and night then realized that I could also shape shift."

"That's unbelievable" he said watching the man and the girl for a moment before continuing "but back to the situation at hand, you do know Logan doesn't remember anything before the weapon x project, which happened many years ago. We have been trying to regain those memories, but have not gotten very far. I am worried he will not believe you and think this is a trap. It has been hard getting past the damage of the weapon x project."

"I feared he wouldn't remember Me." shoko said, her eyes filling with tears.

"Come now, I will introduce you to the man who has come to be known as wolverine. Do you still have the necklace he mentioned in that letter?"

"Of course I do," Shoko, said pulling the charm out from her kimono "I've worn it every day since I found it."

Xavier led Shoko to the edge of the festivity and called out "Logan, can you come here please?"

Logan turned and saw Shoko, as he approached he began to stare at her and his scowl became softer, he kept his gaze on her as he began to question Xavier

"Who is she? What is she doing here?"

"This is Shoko she will be joining us at the mansion."

Logan approached Shoko and put his hand out to shake hers. Instead of shaking his hand, she bowed deeply. Logan then bowed to her as a sign of respect.

The young girl Logan had been throwing fireworks with called out "Logan the boys won't let me play with them!"

"Sorry duty calls" Logan said as he ran over to the little girl and scooped her up into his arms.

"Her name is lily she looks up to Logan as if he were her father," Xavier said watching Logan with the girl.

Shoko turned to him and said, "He's always been that way with little girls he would never hurt them and they can see it in his eyes, he is easy to trust but just as easy to be wary of"

"Shoko I would be very happy if you would join us at the x mansion," Xavier said

"What's that?"

"It's officially called the Charles Xavier academy for higher learning. I created it as a school for mutants where one could learn how to control their powers and become one with society. For many years, we have been a safe haven for mutants, far from the discrimination of everyday culture. I would love you to join us there and meet my group of 'X-men'. There is a lot that we all could learn from you. What do you say?"

"I'm just not sure" Shoko said looking once more at Logan "does he stay there?" she turned to Xavier and when he nodded she said "then I will go and stay at least long enough to become reacquainted with Logan, then I may need to return home. I will not stay here forever."

"That's understandable I wouldn't ask that of you," Xavier said rubbing his hands together "its getting cold out would you like to go now?"

"Yes, but I just have one question" Shoko turned to look at Logan once more "who's child is that he's with?"

"Don't worry she is not his child" Xavier said smiling "her mother was a mutant who was killed by an extremist group; we have decided to take her in until we can find her some family to stay with. The real problem is that she is terribly shy and has really only opened up to Logan"

"Okay" Shoko said, "now that I got that answered I'm ready to go"

Xavier scanned the crowd for a moment before making his way over to a large man wearing a wide brimmed hat and a long coat. The man folded his news paper and stood as Xavier approached

"Did you need some thing professor?" the man said

"This is Shoko she will be staying with us in the mansion. Could you please take her there now and find her a room close to Logan's to stay in?"

"Sure thing" he said then he turned to Shoko and held out his hand to shake hers "I'm Doctor Hank McCoy and I will be giving you a tour of your new home"

Shoko shook his hand, and then looked up into his eyes. She gasped when she saw that his face was blue and hairy.

"I'm sorry if my appearance scared you. I've looked like this for a long time so I'm used to that reaction"

Shoko lowered her head when she spoke "I'm sorry Dr. McCoy. I was just startled. I meant you no dishonor or disrespect. I really am sorry I have shamed myself"

"Don't worry, but come on and I will show you the way."


	2. Chapter 2

A/N- i know that this is starting slow its just that i have been very busy and the story just has to be perfect... please read and review!

also- wolverine and x-men do not belong to me, but Shoko does she is my very own character enjoy!

About an hour, later Shoko was finally alone in her new room. She looked outside and saw a few boys playing basketball; she watched them for a few minutes before Shoko turned away from the window. she changed her clothes taking off the fancy kimono and replacing it with a tank top and a pair of jeans.

"Funny, it always feels like I'm playing dress up when I wear clothes like this," Shoko said into her mirror. Shoko then decided to explore. She left her room and as she passed the room next to hers, she smelled the faint scent of cigar smoke; she paused then decided to find out whose room it was. She knocked on the door and when she got no answer, she pushed it open. Shoko took a long look around. On one wall, there was a Canadian flag; across the room was a large dresser that had an ashtray with a dozen cigar stubs. Shoko sat on the edge of the bed and said aloud "so, Logan this is your domain?" she then went into the bathroom and looked around. On the edge of the sink she picked up a chain that had a pair of dog tags that had 'wolverine' and what shoko assumed was a serial number engraved into them. She turned them over in her hand.

Shoko began to speak aloud to her self once more "Logan, where is your Bushido? Where is your honor? Where is the samurai you once were?"

She did not hear Logan come in. he watched her for a moment as she was adjusting his toothbrush and smelling his cologne. He then spoke "I don't remember being a samurai. I wield a sword with ease but still do not feel as if a samurai runs in my veins. My honor was stolen and I spend every day trying to atone and lift the blanket of shame that surrounds me."

Shoko blushed as he spoke after a long silence Shoko spoke "I didn't mean to snoop. It's just that I wandered in here and wanted to see if you had changed from all those years ago."

Logan took a long look at Shoko and then said, "All I want to know is why you tracked me here. I want to know what I was to you. What are you looking for?"

"You were my husband. Do not worry because there is nothing important to drag you back. I looked for you because I loved you and wanted to find the man that I loved so much."

"Shoko I'm so sorry I just don't remember you" Logan stepped a little closer "this is a lot to handle, I think I need to be alone"

Shoko pushed past Logan and ran to her room, slamming the door as she entered. Shoko sat on the bed and noticed that she still had Logan's dog tags. She dropped them on the nightstand "good night Logan" Shoko said to the wall that separated their rooms.

About an hour and a half, later shoko was laying awake in bed staring at the ceiling "_he's right there just a few feet away and he almost recognized me. I just wish I knew what it would take to trigger his memory" _shoko thought. The sound of her door opening startled shoko from her thoughts. Lily, the child from the park, opened the door.

"Logan, are you awake? I had a nightmare," she said

Shoko turned on the lamp "I'm sorry honey, this isn't Logan's room, and his room is next door"

"Why is his door locked? He never locks his door" Lily said her eyes widening.

Shoko had seen those eyes before the look that lily gave her was so familiar that it was eerily creepy. Shoko shook her head and said, "My name is Shoko, me and Logan were friends a long time ago. I'm not really sure why his door is locked but if you want, you can tell me all about your nightmare."

Shoko watched the little girl as she nodded and walked over to the bed. Shoko picked up Lily then carried her to bed. As she put lily to bed Shoko slipped the dog tags around her neck. A short while later, after a bedtime story, shoko looked over and noticed that lily was sleeping so she tucked the covers up under her chin. As she left Lily's room, she heard voices.

"Where is Lily?"

"She's with Shoko in Lily's room"

Shoko turned the corner when she heard her name. "Are you looking for me and lily?" shoko said walking up to Xavier and Logan in the hallway. "Lily is in her room sleeping"

Logan turned to meet her eyes; shoko could see the anger in them.

"Should I give the two of you some privacy?" Xavier asked smiling.

Logan ignored him and said to shoko "why didn't you tell me where she was?"

Shoko waited as Xavier wheeled away and then said "when, Logan? When you locked yourself in your room and she was scared. When she was looking for comfort and a bedtime story. Really…when?"

"I don't have time to answer you," he snarled and with that, he turned and walked away.

Shoko began to walk back to her room and passed Xavier. As she walked past, he said, "How did you answer him? Did you hold your tongue?"

"I would have loved to given him a piece of my mind, but, he stormed off"

"Why don't you try and get some sleep and tomorrow I will give you a full tour of the grounds." as Xavier left he said "good night and I wouldn't be upset if you did tell him how you felt."


	3. Chapter 3

A/N im sooooo sorry if there has been problems with this story kind of seeming like its missing peices... well it was, since i use microsoft WORKS instead of microsoft WORD like supports i keep having to re format all of my chapters before i upload them and i was finding that it was chopping bits and peices out. im sorry if there was anything that didnt make sence! but i hope you enjoy this story! please read and review!!

Also: Wolverine/Logan and the x-men do not belong to me, but my lovely Shoko does!

"The next morning Shoko awoke to the sound of children running and giggling through the halls. Shoko decided to go down stairs and get some breakfast. A few minuets later Shoko was sitting in the large kitchen eating a bowl of cereal when Xavier came in.

"How did you sleep?" Xavier said pouring himself a glass of orange juice.

"I guess I slept alright, as best as you can get I suppose"

"Would you like to take a tour of the grounds?"

"Sure why not?"

Xavier led the way as he showed her the school she saw all the things that had been built to protect his students. The school was like a small fortress. Xavier spoke of some of his former students who had become active in politics and in the media and Shoko began to see really how influential Xavier was in the mutant community.

"I just don't understand, why did you do all of this?"

"Well," Xavier said stopping "I believe that we one day can be at peace with the regular population. As long as we can teach all of our mutant children how to control their powers we can bring a new era to earth."

"I didn't know how much of an impact that you have made on this community."

She stopped, watching some men playing basketball on a huge court. The men separated into two teams, one team wearing shirts and the other team shirtless, running frantically around the court. One of the shirtless men was Logan; he was running across the court like a lion about to pounce. Shoko stopped and stared. Logan threw the ball to score the game winning point. A moment later the game broke up, Shoko watched Logan get a drink of water and as another player walked up to him, pointing to Xavier and Shoko. Logan looked over and met eyes with Shoko. He ran over to her.

"Shoko I was looking for you. I wanted to apologize for this morning. He looked her over and said, "That is a nice outfit you're wearing." he smiled at her waiting for a response.

"You know that this is a plain ensemble. Why pretend you know nothing of quality? Do you like to mock me? Also, do not stare at me like I am one of your whiskey bottle harlots." then Shoko slapped him across the face. "I am not your hooker, do not look at me like a pimp." she said, and then stormed away.

"Why do women always take everything as an insult?" Logan yelled.

"Well Logan I would hate to see what she may have done if she were angry." Xavier said shaking his head.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N- the x-men and wolvering do not belong to me but my darling Shoko does please enjoy, and read and review!

Minuets later Shoko stormed into her room slamming the door behind her. She sat on the corner of the bed and tried to calm down. "_I let my feelings get out of control again, I tried too hard, and I need to remember that Logan is not the same man that I once knew. He doesn't remember me. He is not the brave warrior I knew many lives ago. He is a gijun now, a shell of himself who has been battered, tortured and tested. He is not mine any more, I cannot lay claim to him. He is nothing to me any more." _Shoko though. She stood and began to pick up her belongings from around the room. There was a knock on the door.

"Insult me again if you dare," she said flinging open the door.

"Please let me ask how did I insult you the first time?" Beast said.

"Dr. McCoy, I'm sorry I wasn't expecting you."

"It's Hank, please, I saw you storm in and was wondering if you'd like to go blow off some steam down in the danger room?"

"Sure, it would help me calm down" with that said, she silently followed Hank down to the danger room

Logan needed a shower so he headed up stairs to his room. As he passed Shoko's room, he decided to try apologizing again. When he knocked on the door it swung open freely, hitting him with the powerful scent of cherry blossoms, he stood for a moment deeply inhaling the scent. Logan decided to find out where it was coming from, and walked in sniffing the air as he walked over to the dresser. As he reached for the knob on the top drawer, a scroll lying on top of the dresser caught his eye. He picked it up and noticed that it looked very old. He unfurled it and noticed it was a painting, as he looked more closely, he realized who it portrayed. Logan saw himself and Shoko; it was a beautiful painting and was incredibly life like, almost like a photo. Logan's eyes traveled down the paper and looked at the signature at the bottom, it read:

_Dear mom and dad,_

_Here is a painting of the two of you to remember your anniversary forever. I love you both._

_Love, Suki_

"Suki? Who is Suki?" Logan said to him self, thinking hard, the only thought that came to his mind was of a young girl with big almond eyes

xxxxxxxxx(begin flashback)xxxxxxxx

'_Daddy I sat too close to the candle and now my hair is short on one side!'_ Logan watched himself slowly extend one hand and use a knife to trim the girls' hair until it looked reasonable, _'daddy, will the boys tease me and say my hair is too short?'_

_'Of course not, it's very pretty like this, and your mother could always put your hair up'_ as Logan said this, the girl crawled into his lap and hugged him.

_'I love you Suki'_

'_I love you too daddy'_

xxxxxxxxx(end flashback)xxxxxxxxxx

"Why?" Logan asked looking at the ceiling "why must I be cursed with these memories that I can't decipher? Suki singed her hair on a lit candle then she came to me crying and I had to cut her hair short" he paused for a moment as he heard the innocent voice ring in his head once more _'I love you too daddy'_

He had never had such a happy memory cloud his mind, "I can see her face but who was she? Damn, Ive got to find Shoko so she can explain this"

He could still smell her scent as he walked down the hall approaching Remy LeBeau. Remy was a tall lean man who also went by the name of Gambit. He always had a deck of cards close at hand , but this time his hands were full with a sandwich and with a full mouth he asked "you lookin' for the pretty mademoiselle(lady) with the tres bien(very nice/good) kimono?"

"what's it to you bub'?"

"Well her an' beast were goin' down to the danger room," Remy said with a wink

"Shove it" Logan said moving past Remy "I ain't got time for you"

"Mad cause you couldn't find her on yer own?"

"I said shove it!" Logan bellowed

"Oui, Oui (yes yes) capi-tan" Remy said saluting with his sandwich as he moved out of the way.

As little as he wanted to admit it, he was glad for the tip because if he had followed Shoko's scent he would most likely have gone around in circles, Hank always took the scenic route. When Logan finally arrived at the danger room Shoko was down in the arena and Hank was in the control room on the entry level typing feverishly at the controls. Logan looked up at the display monitor; he could see Shoko fighting gracefully. He watched her fight for a few moments watching as she moved and ducked as though she were simply a string held in the wind. Shoko's movements entranced Logan before a voice broke through his thoughts.

"Something on your mind Logan?" Hank said continuing to type at an incredible speed.

"Sort of" he paused for a moment watching the screen "ask her something will ya?" Logan asked as he moved closer to Hank peering over him at Shoko through the observation window

"Ask what?" Hank asked looking at Logan for a moment.

"Ask her about me" Logan said looking at the ground "Ask her about us, I want to understand these memories"

"What memories? I thought you had no memories of anything before weapon x"

Logan watched Shoko for a few moments more before answering quietly "I was looking for Shoko a few minuets ago and went in her room and began looking around. I found a beautiful hand painted scroll, it was a painting of Shoko and me. The person who painted it wrote on the bottom that with this scroll we'd always remember our anniversary, it was signed Suki. When I tried remembering who Suki was, I remembered a small girl with dark hair and the biggest almond shaped eyes, she got too close to a candle that was burning and it burned her hair and I had to cut it. Maybe this girl was my daughter because she called me daddy with the sweetest voice and told me she loved me" Logan paused for a moment to collect his thoughts "I want to find my little girl, my Suki. I want to find my flesh and blood and I think Shoko is the key" Logan paused again rubbing his face with his hands "I don't know why I can remember the little girl, I don't know why I can hear her voice ringing in my ears like it was yesterday"

"Don't worry Logan we will run some scans on you later to make sure you are alright. Maybe what you need to fully recover your memories is a trigger; you know something that can just flood your memories back." Hank turned back to the console and began to speak to Shoko over the intercom.

"Tell me a little about your self"

Shoko looked up at the observation booth and asked, "What would you like to know? I am an open book, ask anything and I will tell you the truth" as she said this the simulation changed from the battlefield she had been on, into a maze.

"What was your family like?" Hanks voice echoed through the noise of the simulation.

"Well," Shoko began as she started to navigate the maze "my mother was a geisha and my father was a gijun, you know a white man, and I grew up wanting to follow in my mothers' foot steps and become a geisha. My mother approved of it but my father told me he would disown me if I did. I wanted to be a geisha so badly that my mother sent me away to a school for geisha in the middle of the night and told my father that I had gotten lost in Tokyo the day before. My father mourned me for days, he thought that I was too smart to get lost and not find my way home so he assumed I was dead. When my mother told him that I was alive in a school for geishas, he was so relieved that he forgot about disowning me."

Once again, Hanks voice rang out "why didn't your father want you to be a geisha?"

"He thought that all people should be able to do what they want when they want it. He thought that my mother was bound by what she was, and not by what she wanted. My father met my mother almost ten years before they married; he waited for her to fulfill her obligations to her craft before she could follow her heart. He wanted better than that for me."

As she spoke Logan walked closer to the screen studying Shoko's features wishing that he could recognize her "Hank, ask her why she's here"

Hank spoke into the microphone "Shoko why give up your life as a geisha to come here?"

"I was a geisha many years ago, but one man came to my tea house and swept me off my feet. He patiently courted me then became my Danna," she paused looking for the right word to translate "he became my sponsor. He was a very noble samurai, and a respected member of our village. Eventually he became my husband. Then one day he was stolen away from my children and me. When my children were grown and he had not returned, I vowed to find him and I ended up here"

Logan turned to Hank "ask her about the children"

"Tell me about your children" Hank's voice rang out.

"We had three children, two boys and our little girl Suki, even when she was just a small child she was very mature. She was a wonderful artist; I still have a few paintings she did."

Logan stared down at her through the observation window, he sighed as he placed his palms against the glass. Hank watched Logan for a moment unsure of how to phrase his next question.

"Your children sound like they were blessings, why did you not have more?"

Shoko slowed down for a moment "I would have loved to have more, but sadly our children's mother died during Suki's birth. My husband and I helped their father but he died just a few months later, since they had no one left we took in the children and raised them as our own."

Logan clenched his fists and by reflex, his claws extended "so they weren't mine after all? Once again I raised someone else's children with out any of my own"

"You didn't have any of your own?" Hank called out unsure of what to do or say.

Shoko began to answer "we…I…well…" she looked up to the observation windows and saw a glint of metal that caused her to look harder, she could see the outline of Logan's face. "Well… I think that's a story for another time… I'm done here and I want out."

Shoko stormed towards the exit _'I saw logan in there! Why was he making Hank ask those personal questions? Why would he hide when I would be more than willing to answer Logan' _Shoko fought back tears as she climbed the stairs to the observation room and slammed open the door.

"Logan! You chicken! Why are you hiding up here?"

Hank looked up from the controls and said "Logan left, he figured you had seen him and he didn't want to face you yet"

"You let Logan feed you the questions he was too scared to ask"

Hank looked down at the control panel again typing slowly "he remembered something" he paused for a moment "but he was upset because he didn't remember you"

"Did Logan tell you what he remembered?"

"Something about your daughter Suki, he saw the picture in your room"

Shoko took a deep breath close to tears, hank turned and saw the look on her face and stood up quickly closing the distance between them and laying a hand on Shoko's shoulder trying to comfort her. "Logan is never again going to be the man you fell in love with. Now you're stuck with the man he's become" Shoko began to sob quietly and hank wrapped his arms around her shoulders "for the most part he's a good guy, he bends the rules but he is good deep at heart, maybe you should give the new Logan a chance"


	5. Chapter 5

A/N- im really sorry that this is a short chapter but i needed to end it here. i think that the next chapter will be longer like the last one was... but enjoy!! please read and review!

Also: wolverine/logan/ the x-men do not belong to me but shoko does!

"maybe I should" Shoko said stepping away from Hank "I told myself that I would find the man I loved or love the man I found, but Logan is just so distant, its like he cant connect on any level"

"He has a reason," Hank said "everyone who comes from his past is either out to get him or has a different idea of what their shared past was."

"What do you mean?"

"Weapon-x implanted memories into his brain, memories that tied him to the other members of weapon-x, so he thinks that he has a past with people he barely knows. The worst part is that not everyone got the same memories, Logan vividly remembers his friend silver fox being killed, and then after mourning her for many years he finds out she's alive." Hank paused as he ran his fingers through his hair, "Shoko he's had people search him out for wrongs he's never committed. Been hunted down for things he cannot remember doing. Hunted by people he cannot remember hurting. It is absolutely horrible. You're treating him like he's beneath you but you've told everyone who will listen how great of a man he is or at least used to be."

"I want him to be who he was"

"Shoko you're not going to find that, Xavier's tried to unlock Logan's memories but they weren't blocked out and hidden somewhere deep inside, they were erased. The implanted memories are so tightly ingrained that his sense of the reality of the past is askew. You just need to focus on the future eyes wide open."

"I guess your right, you know he doesn't look any different, I mean he dresses differently but it's like he never aged. It's weird."

Hank looked puzzled for a moment "you know everyone says that. People always say that he hasn't changed a bit, but you know what he's changed a lot in just the time that Ive known him. He's stopped doing things just because he was told they were right and started doing what ever he feels and believes is right. It may not always be legal or what the public would do but he has learned to follow his instincts, Most of the time he lands in a sticky situation, but he feels his choices are worth the trouble because he made up his own mind. Please Shoko, please give Logan a chance, give the man he is now a chance."

Shoko looked at Hank for a moment before speaking "thank you very much, I think I may need some time to handle all of this. Can I ask you one question?"

"Anything Shoko"

"Does Logan still hang out in seedy bars drinking whiskey and smoking cigars until the wee hours of the morning?"

"Most nights he heads out on his motorcycle, to a little dive bar on top of the hill, he says he likes it there because the people there aren't very quick to judge."

"Well good, now I know where I'm going tonight" Shoko said with a devilish grin.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: thank you to every one who read my story so far and special thanks go to my friends Padfoot for helping me with my horrible grammar and similies, and J-chan Blue for inspiring me and helping me out of a severe case of writers block! also i dont own any of the x-men but i do own Shoko! shes great aint she?

Shoko was nervous as she showered and dressed, her palms were sweating as she did her makeup, she was shaking by the time she put on her shoes and went down stairs. Shoko quickly found the garage and looked around; there was only one motorcycle there. A real hog of a bike probably built from a Harley, but it was personalized. She ran her fingers over the seat and instantly knew that this was Logan's baby. Shoko stood still as she heard soft footsteps approach.

"Admiring my bike?" Logan asked as he slipped on a well-worn leather jacket.

"Its nice, you ever ride it?" Shoko asked still running her fingers over the seat.

"All the time." Logan said smiling as he walked in front of her and got on the bike "I'm taking it for a spin, wanna ride along?" he patted the empty seat behind him "this baby seats two."

Shoko didn't answer; she just climbed on and gripped the bottom of her seat for support as she waited for Logan to start it up.

Logan drove out of the garage carefully and as they began to drive further away, she noticed that he seemed like he was driving cautiously.

"Why are you taking it so easy?" Shoko asked with a smirk on her face.

"You want me to show you what this baby can really do?"

Shoko leaned a little closer so she could speak right in his ear, "well I though they called you Wolverine for a reason, unless you want me to start calling you the little old lady in the slow lane"

Logan turned his head towards her brushing the side of his face against her lips and nose, his whiskers tickling her before her lips brushed against his ear, "okay, and hang on Shoko"

Shoko jerked back as Logan shifted gears so she grabbed the fabric at his sides to steady herself. Logan took her left hand in his and pulled her hand to his chest saying loudly over the roar of the engine. "Hold tight the path winds around the mountain." he gave her hand a little squeeze before reaching once more for the handlebars.

Shoko slipped her other arm around Logan as he leaned into a turn; she admired the view as she could feel the rise and fall of Logan's chest with each breath. She clutched him tightly as he drove, pressing her face to the back of his neck, smelling his scent, she smiled as she embraced the innocence of the moment. Soon they reached the top of the hill, and Logan pulled off to the side of the road, stopping before a few small picnic tables.

"I thought we were going to go to your little bar?"

"What bar?" Logan asked putting the kickstand down.

"Well Hank said you go to this little dive bar all the time, I just figured that's where you would take me."

Logan pointed to a lighted area halfway down the other side of the hill, "its there, but every night before I go to the bar I come here to collect my thoughts. Wanna think with me for a little while?"

Shoko only nodded as she made her way over to one of the tables, she sat on it and put her feet on the bench, Logan followed but he sat on the bench close to her legs.

"If you look a little to the left you can see the whole town from here"

"Logan the view is not what I wanted to see."

"I know" Logan said turning his head away from her

They sat in silence for a few minuets before Logan spoke again "do you still love me?"

"Why would you ask me a silly question like that?"

Logan turned and locked eyes with her, "that's what I thought"

Shoko cocked her head to the side "what do you mean by that?"

Logan did not answer; instead, he posed another question "how did you find me?"

"Yuriko"

His eyes widened as he spoke "why would she help you?"

"She was forced to." Shoko said very blandly as she turned her head away.

"Can you explain?"

"No"

Logan stood and walked a few feet away "she hates me, she became Lady Deathstrike so she could avenge her fathers death by killing me"

"I know that, but I have cleared your debt to her"

"What?" Logan said walking up to Shoko again, stopping just inches away from her, "you need to explain this to me right now"

"Her mother owed me her life, and when Yuriko told me that she was going to take your life to revenge her father, I simply stated that if she killed my husband that I would have to collect on her mothers' debt."

"So Yuriko ain't gonna come after me no more?"

Shoko looked up and met his eyes "no she won't because her mother is very dear to her, and I am bound by my honor to keep my word"

"Bound by your honor?" Logan said with a smile

Shoko paused for a moment watching how a smile toyed with the corners of his mouth, how his lips made the slightest curve, watched the corners of his eyes wrinkle and she giggled when he crinkled his nose. "Yes" she said licking her lips "I am bound by my honor, its all that I have left"

Logan stood and listened as he heard some music from the bar below drift up the hill, he looked questioningly at Shoko "wanna dance?"

Shoko stood and placed her hands on Logan's shoulders as he slipped his hands around her waist.

"Did we used to do this?" Logan asked pulling Shoko against him.

"Sometimes, but you never were a very good dancer"

"Ever get that feeling when something just feels right?" Logan asked looking straight into her eyes.

"Sometimes, why?"

Logan paused for a moment before capturing her lips with his own; he kissed her with a softness that surprised even him. His kiss was warm and passionate as if he was trying to send a message. As Logan kissed Shoko, she tightened her hold on him returning his kiss. As they kissed, it was as if time was standing still. Logan reached up and took her face in his hands, breaking the kiss to look into her eyes "because this just feels right, like there has never been a moment that I haven't had you here,"

Shoko's eyes filled with tears as she smiled "it does feel right"

Logan kissed her again, pulling her closer as he wrapped his arms around her once more, massaging the small of her back. After a few moments he broke away again and said "you know what I don't really feel like goin' to the bar anymore, you wanna just head home?"

"Sure Logan, what ever you want" Shoko said smiling

"Well then" he said dangling his keys in front of her, "you want a turn to drive?"

Shoko snatched the keys from him and jogged over to the bike hopping on "come on this baby seats two" she said patting the seat just as Logan had done earlier.

"Do you know how to drive a motorcycle?"

"Yes, but I haven't in a long time"

As Logan slid into the seat behind her, she put the key into the ignition and started it up, but she could not seem to put the bike into gear. "Need some help?" Logan asked looking over her shoulder.

"A little" she answered still trying to shift the bike.

"Well answer one question and I will help you. Where did we get married?"

"We were married in our village in front of the giant golden Buddha."

"Good to know" Logan said before sliding closer to Shoko putting his hands over hers on the handlebars.

Shoko held her breath as she felt the taught muscles of his thighs press against hers, his muscular chest pressed up against her shoulder blades. She smiled as his hard, angular, and masculine body contoured her soft, curved, and smooth form.

Logan could hear her heartbeat speed up, as he pressed his nose to the back of her ear, her scent wafted up to meet him with each ever increasing beat of her heart, her scent reminded him of the smell of the first cherry blossoms of spring, it was like a dizzying perfume. Logan became almost entranced as he enjoyed the closeness they shared.

"do you think that I will ever remember you?" Logan asked dreading the answer.

"no but I do hope that you will" Shoko answered.

Logan pulled away a little as he smelled the saltiness of Shoko's tears. After a moment of driving he once again rested his head against hers, smelling her scent, but it wasn't until too late that he heard a bullet whizzing towards them, the bullet seemed to miss its target when instead of hitting either of them it hit the front tire bursting it upon impact. as the bike lunged forward Logan instinctively grabbed Shoko and began pulling her backwards away from the bike. Then a second bullet hit missing Shoko's leg by an inch and piercing the gas tank igniting the gasoline inside as the bike exploded and the two were engulfed in flames. The last thing that Logan heard were Shoko's screams.

A/N yes im sorry it's a cliffy but what ever! Maybe if you review you will inspire me to post the next chapter faster!


	7. Chapter 7

A/N i know youre all gonna hate me for this chapter but i worked really hard ont eh song fic i posted today and wasnt even gonna post this but i got so many reviews i figured i have to! but as we all know the x-men dont belong to me but shoko does!!

Half a mile away a shrouded man watched the explosion through the scope of his sniper rifle,

he hadn't been expecting Logan to come riding down this road for at least another hour,

and he certainly didn't expect there to be a woman driving Logans beloved bike.

he wasn't ready for the first shot but as soon as he saw that he was aimed for a woman he decided that he would have to aim for the bike

and hope that the explosion would kill them both at the same time,

there was no room for errors.

he shot out the tire and then the gas tank hoping that the collision combined with the explosion would leave little evidence and would finish them both off quickly and cleanly.


	8. Chapter 8

A/N the x-men dont belong to me but Shoko does!! and i wasnt gonna post this chapter untill tomorrow but i felt like i was scamming every one by posting such a short chapter so here is an extra one for all of you!

Xavier was reading the news paper in his study when he heard a explosion from out side, he wheeled himself out onto the balcony then saw hank on the ground below

"Hank" he called out "do you have any idea of what that was?"

"no" hank said sniffing the air, a moment later he winced as the smell of burning gasoline hit his nose "I'm going to go find out what it is I think it might be Logan" and with that said he ran off.

--------------------------

Logan woke groggily and recoiled as he felt the sickening process of his skin growing back, he thought foggily for a moment that he would never get used to that feeling, as soon as his mind cleared and he remembered where he was, his next conscious thought was of Shoko. he sniffed deeply trying to locate her. he gagged as he smelled the familiar scent of singed hair and burning flesh. Logan dragged himself over to where Shoko was and brushed what little hair was left from Shokos eyes.

"Ive got you now, you're safe, I'm gonna take you home so you wont have to suffer in pain anymore" Logan said as he struggled to his feet. He leaned down and lifted the unconscious Shoko into his arms, he began walking back to the mansion and after a few minuets he was coming close to the front gate.

--------------------------

Hank ran to the gate and threw it open before seeing Logan carrying Shoko, Logan walked up to hank and said "take her hank , get her help, take her" he placed Shoko into hanks arms and then proceeded to pass out collapsing to the ground. Hank readjusted gathering Shoko in one arm and reaching down with the other to grab one of Logans arms and began dragging him towards the mansion. Within minuets hank was back at the mansion and surrounded by the rest of the x-men team who took Shoko and Logan to the medical ward.


	9. Chapter 9

A/N- ok im sorry for the shortness of the chapters but this is where it all gets going!!!!

the x-men and wolverine do not belong to me but shoko does enjoy!

Shoko had been under constant medical care for three days since the accident and still had not woken from her coma. The entire time since Logan had recovered he had been forbidden from seeing Shoko. The doctors were worried that if Shokos last memories were of Logan and now she was in immense pain she would blame Logan for her injuries, if he was the first thing she saw upon waking up she could go into shock. So instead Logan had taken to sending Hank in every few hours to check up on her and see if she was awake yet.

----------------------------------

Shoko was not in a coma, a coma is a deep dreamless sleep, how Shoko wished she didn't have to suffer through the dreams. They were haunting her, she was unable to wake, unable to stop the tremor like nightmares that kept her scared.

She had been having the same nightmare over and over……

-----------------

_Shoko was running through the woods as a booming voice rang out all around her _

_"why have you come?"_

_No matter how hard she tried she couldn't remember who the voice belonged to and it was haunting her._

_"why have you returned for him?"_

_Shoko now knew that the voice was referring to Logan, but instead of answering this unseen person she stopped in her tracks._

_"what do you want Shoko?" _

_Now the mysterious voice had used her name, she began to tremble she was so scared. Shoko could not understand why escape was impossible._

_"Shoko I'm here inside of your head"_

_The voice rang out echoing through the whole forest._

_"stay away from him, he's not yours anymore, you can have him, he's mine!"_

_Shoko tried to call out for help but when she opened her mouth she had no voice._

_"he's not going to come back to you"_

_She tried to run away but it felt like she was glued to the spot, she began to weep._

_"go home and collect your little secret and run far, far away, go somewhere where he wont find you."_

_Shoko felt a sinking feeling in her stomach, she though no one knew about her biggest secret, she began sobbing, she though she had a better job of hiding._

_"I'm surprised you didn't tell him all about her, make him follow you home."_

_Shoko began running again trying to get away from the voice that was harassing her._

_"don't let him find her, if he does I will kill her"_

_Shoko ran further through the forest until she saw a break in the trees, each time she had this dream the closer she got to the sunlight in the clearing, the last thing she heard as she broke through the wall of trees was_

_"if and when I have to kill her, I will kill your beloved Logan as well, then make you suffer alone for the rest of your days."_

_----------------------------------_

Shoko woke screaming a single word

**Suki**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N-** Im so sorry that I havent updated in a long time but life has been really hectic and I havent been able to get into the characters the way that I would have liked to ... but Im slowly finding my inspiration... and thanks to J-Chan! She totally fell in love with the characters and has always had something to say thats given me a hundred new ideas... so this chapter is dedicated to her!

"how are you feeling?" Hank asked pouring some water for Shoko.

"not bad really, after I woke up it was easy enough to heal myself"

"heal yourself?" he asked handing over the glass.

"yeah" Shoko said slipping some of the water "I can control my body on a cellular level, its weird I know, but I can shape shift and make my body do things it normally shouldn't be able to"

"really?" Hank asked looking over the charts at the end of her bed.

"Well at least since you woke up your vital signs have been normal, but there's something odd about your charts"

Shoko put down the glass knowing what he was about to say "what's weird?"

"The charts say that your body was deteriorating very rapidly like you were aging it ten times the normal rate"

"I know Hank, and if they run the same tests, they'll find out that all the signs of aging are gone like I suddenly stopped growing any older" she paused for a moment before continuing. "I'm very old, but I control my body very well I stop myself from aging. Even in the depths of a coma I haven't aged myself to death, I stop eventually"

Hank just nodded shocked by all of the information "wow" was all he could say.

"You know, I get that reaction more often than I'd like, it's sad really, I mean no offense."

"I understand" Hanks said raising a hand to silence her "you have a wonderful ability, which might if I will took a sample of your blood to run some tests on?"

"No, go ahead" Shoko said, baring her arm for Hank. "They have already drained me for what I am worth." She smiled to herself, before remembering her dream. "Hank do you think I could get some privacy?"

Shoko formulated her plan as Hank left the room "I'm going home… hello Japan" she said silently as she unhooked herself from the IV in the monitors. She quickly began to throw together her things and took the shape of a female student as she left the room. She quickly headed upstairs into her bedroom in the mansion. Upon entering, she took the shape of Remy knowing that he was still at the hospital when she got into her room. She quickly jotted down a letter and left it on the bed knowing that she didn't want to leave loose ends. She gathered all of her things then took the shape of Hank McCoy and left as quickly as she could, when she passed a group of students. They asked her what she was doing with everything reply was "Shoko asked me to take some of her things to her at the hospital."

Soon enough, she was at the airport in her true form.

She was going home.

Logan knew something was wrong, because they still wouldn't let him see Shoko and she had already woken. when Shoko's room was void of medical staff Logan snuck in and was surprised to find the room empty.

"Where is she?" Logan growled as he walked out and bumped into Beast "she's gone Hank"

"where did she go?" Hank asked taken aback.

"I don't know I'm going home to look for her"

Hank only followed as he went with Logan to the x-mansion Hank was quiet as they approached Shoko's room Logan hadn't even open the door before saying "she's not here."

"How do you know?" Hank asked skeptical.

"Her scent, Hank" Logan said inhaling deeply as he opened the door and stepped inside. "It's gone" as he inhaled again, he noticed the scent of cherry blossoms had been replaced by the smell of the hospital. The clean sanitary smell of the hospital Logan noticed the letter on the bed and began reading it

_Dear Logan,_

_I'm sorry to do this to you but I must go home. I came here looking for something you could not give. You cannot give me yourself. You could not give me the man you once were. You cannot love me. I fear I have found only your contempt. I shouldn't have come. I knew the trials I had to face and alas they were too hard. I thought if I came here. I would find something special. I would find the father of my children and the love I wish I never lost. I will not tell you not to look for me because I know you will, but know that nothing but your memories will help you find me._

_Love, _

_Shoko_

Logan put the letter back on the bed and stared at the wall for a moment. He clenched and unclenched his fists for a moment, unsure of what to do next. Logan turned to look at Hank a look halfway between anger and sorrow crossed his face.

"She left, she ran away and left"

Hank looked at him with a blank expression on his face. Unsure of what to do or say he spoke quietly. "Are you going to look for her? Or did she ask you not to?"

"I think... I think she wanted me to look for her, she said, only my memories would lead the way." He looked away ashamed. If Hank hadn't of known better, he would've thought he saw tears in Logan's eyes. "I think... Wait I know." Logan said as he sat on the edge of the bed burying his face in his hands. "I know this is all my fault. My fault her children grew up without a father, my fault she spent a lifetime looking for love, and lastly my fault that I couldn't be that man she loved."

"Ask Xavier, ask him to use Cerebro to find her"

"what good would it do? what if I'm still not what she wants?" Logan said.

"But what if you never find out?"


	11. Chapter 11

Shoko yawned as she looked out the airplane window, she had not wanted to leave, but she had no other choice. She sighed as she caught herself daydreaming again it was always the same fantasy. She laid her head against the window and closed her eyes, hoping that sleep would find her fast.

_When she opened her eyes , She found herself back at the farm she had so many years ago, outside she heard the children playing, and for one horrifying moment She had to re-live the day that she lost Logan, her mind was filled with screams. _

_The poor pathetic crying of her children and then she saw the wagon and she knew what lay in side. _

_Her feet begin to move slowly towards the wagon, and she heard the mans voice reverberate through her head. _

_She knew what he would say, and Shoko knew what he would do. _

_She felt herself began to shake and saw the and she knew that she had relived this so many times it was like a sick play that she performed every night... _

_...she knew the words... _

_...She knew the songs... _

_...she knew the dance... _

_...she knew when the audience would clap their hands... _

_...and she knew that no matter what Logan would never come back to her..._

_Even though she didn't want to she tried to shut it out and she tried to look away. She followed as the man opened the door and showed her Logan's body inside the wagon, she saw his twisted broken body laying there cold and blood spattered and heard herself scream, "it can't be. He's not dead he never dies, he told me he'd live with me forever. He... He... He told me he would never leave me." _

_She remembered the feeling as she collapsed to the ground. She remembered the tear stained faces of her children she felt herself be carried into bed and had a cool towel laid upon her head._

_And now came the surprise ending... _

_...The part that she never knew... _

_...the part that was never scripted..._

_She lay there quietly as she heard the crack of a whip and the sound of horses feet. She watched as the wagon moved over the land… and she knew that this was the time that one of the men would carry the children into the house to comfort her, but instead she followed the wagon as it moved down the road stopping to hide when it pulled over. _

_A man was sitting on the side of the road waiting for the wagon and he pulled Logan from the back slowly as Logan began to wake. Logan was groggy and disorientated as the man slapped his face to wake him, when Logan was fully awake the man said in a low tone "Logan I have killed you and brought you back from the dead, but you must leave... you must never speak to your wife or your children again"_

_Logan seemed to want to crawl out of his skin as his wounds slowly began to heal "why? Why must I stay away from the ones that I love?"_

_Shoko then realized it… the man that she was watching was the man that had haunted her dreams when she was in the hospital, this was the man that was keeping her and Logan apart._

"_because if you don't I will kill all of them"_


	12. Chapter 12

Shoko jerked awake as the plan landed roughly, and she took a look around seeing the familiar scenery of Japan coming to meet her eyes. She shook herself to rid her mind of the horrid dream she had.

Shoko stepped off of the plane and walked to the side of the air strip where a limo was waiting for her, she still thought it strange that she got such star treatment, but in her little village she and her daughter had become religious leaders, Shoko had seen it all, the wars, the famine, the heartbreak, the trials of men. There was nothing that was new to her, and she liked it that way, but only the monks at the village shrine knew her secret, and that was a closely guarded one as well. Most of the villagers thought that it was a long line of women from the same family that took over the place of the head of the shrine every few decades. But alas it was always Shoko, she would just go away for about six months every few years and the monks would explain her absences, most villagers thought it was a simple trick to gain tourism, and sure enough it worked.

In the village shrine there was also a giant golden Buddha statue in the center, it was brought there when a wealthy man paid to have it made then couldn't afford the men it would take to haul it up the mountain side to his house, so he asked the monks of the shrine to keep it in the prayer house.

Shoko thought of the Buddha fondly as the limo ride was taking her closer to her destination, she smiled remembering the day that her and Logan were married in front of it.

The limo stopped at the bottom of a long dirt road and one of the village monks got out and opened Shoko's door for her. "you didn't have to accompany me to the village you know" she said looking at the oldest monk from the shrine.

"but lady Shoko, what would you do without me here to entertain you? And how would you get caught up on all the news of the village?" the man asked beginning to lead the way on the dirt road.

"gossip you mean… and I'm sure there are other ways… but just like always you are here to join me, although I think you like these walks more then I do." she smiled as she fell in step with the old man.

For the next hour while Shoko and the monk walked slowly to the sleepy village he filled her in on all the gossip, who had a baby, who was dating whom, who had the best harvest, who had passed, the health of all the villagers, and lastly how the shrine was going with the tourists.

Shoko played her part well nodding at the right times and sighing occasionally as he spoke… it wasn't that she didn't care it was that she knew the villagers could take care of them selves without her around.

When they finally got to the much spoken of village Shoko walked straight into the shrine and swept down a few dark hallways until she found herself in front of a false wall, that's where her biggest secret was hiding…

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

A small child of about seven or eight sat on a tall stool swinging her feet, she shivered as she remembered the strange dream she had that morning, she had dreamed that her mother was in the hospital and was screaming her name.

The screams were so loud and so real that they woke her from the depths of slumber. Then she got up and painted.

The child held the paint brush in one hand and part of a broken plate in the other as she began to paint… the scene was a pleasantly romantic one… it was her mother and father dancing up on the top of a hill, the hill overlooked the city and the dark cityscape was dotted with tiny lights, off to the side of the couple there was a old motorcycle. The girl strained to get the picture just perfect like she saw in her mind.

Her mother would be proud of her for this, she was sure, her mother missed her paintings so much.

"mommy's gonna love this one! It's so pretty! And I haven't painted anything in so long… mommy always tells me that she loves my paintings." the child seemed to speak to the painting.

Then the girls hand moved to the man in the picture and her eyes began to water a little bit as her fingertips brushed over the form. "I miss you everyday Daddy."

The little girl hugged herself as she got down from the stool and she remembered the last time that her father had told her he loved her

Xxxxxxxxxx(begin flashback)xxxxxxxxxxx

_The man stood holding his arms out for his little girl as she ran towards him._

"_daddy can I come with you today?" she cried out as she flung herself into his arms._

_The man lifted his little girl as he hugged her to his chest "no honey I'm sorry you cant today, you are supposed to be going and getting lessons on how to write today"_

"_I know daddy but its much more fun to spend time with you"_

"_I know my little princess but I will see you after you're done, and then you can show me everything you've written"_

"_ok daddy" the little girl said throwing her arms around her fathers neck "I love you daddy"_

_He smiled as he looked into his precious daughters big almond eyes _

"_I love you too Suki"_

A/N- this chapter is dedicated totally to J-chan because she has helped me figure out so much of this story out, and because she is totally and one hundred percent Suki.


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N-** Im super sorry with how long this took to get here, I suffered a crash on my computer and I lost what I had ready to be published... but im back!

When Shoko had opened up the false wall, the wall that held her most well kept secret, she was greeted by an empty room and the smell of paint, she didn't get it at all, but as soon as she entered into the room one of the monks came running to find her.

"Lady Shoko! Lady Shoko!" he panted breathlessly as he gained her side, "I've been sent to fetch you as fast as possible! You're house has finally been finished! And it was done just earlier this day!"

Shoko smiled at the man, he hadn't been in the village long apparently, because the house that he spoke of always needed repairs, it was a house that was simply that old, but shoko didn't mind if it was cold or the oven didn't work, and she listened patently as he droned on about what had been fixed and things like that, finally she spoke.

"You know, I'm tired from my trip, why don't you walk me over there."

As the young man led Shoko to her house in the village, she noticed that all the village people seemed to be gossiping, talking in hushed whispers and when it got to be too odd for Shoko's tastes she asked the young monk "the people they whisper, what is going on?"

The monk did not answer for a long moment, he waited until he had ushered her into her home that he spoke.

"Lady Shoko, three days ago, one day after you contacted us to let us know you were coming, a strange man appeared here, and he has been here, meditating in front of the giant golden Buddha since, he has not moved, not even to relieve himself or have a drink of water, and we are worried that he has followed you here."

Shoko thought for a long time, there was no way that it had taken her three days to get here, but then she thought hard, there was a layover in Russia, and with the time difference and all, maybe it had been three days since she left.

"I will dress and ready myself for a confrontation, you are to go there now and watch him, if he so much as twitches I want you to come back and tell me all about it."

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Thirty minuets later Shoko was dressing, brushing her hair after a hot shower, her mind went wild trying to imagine who it was waiting for her here, and she hoped with all of her heart that it was Logan there waiting for her. And soon enough she was dressed and ready, stepping out of her modest home and walking proudly to the shrine, and there were the usual amount of tourists, even some monks meditating in front of the statue, but once she caught sight of several villagers watching one spot in general she beckoned one of the monks over, politely asking him to close the area down for now, just for some routine maintenance, and while he cleared the area of the people, she moved towards the figure sitting facing away from her.

When she was twenty feet away a deep gravely voice spoke to her,

"You know, I could smell you when you entered the village, I was wondering how long it was gonna take you to get here."

Shoko's heart caught in her chest, and she desperately wanted to run to Logan and wrap her arms around his neck and hold him tight to her, but her foot steps faltered and she spoke softly "they told me you were here, I should have believed them, but why did you come here?"

"I wanted to go somewhere that I knew would be safe, somewhere that I could be alone with my thoughts, and when I tried figuring out a place, my feet led me here."

Shoko sucked in a jagged breath, her heart beating erratically as she watched him from behind, slowly he rose and turned towards her, his face looked almost drained of life, he looked very sad and depressed. Shoko stood her ground, as much as she wanted to take his face in her hand and kiss the heart ache away she would not, he didn't remember her anymore, so she figured that would have been a waste.

"Shoko I had to come here, I felt like this was the right place to be, and I missed you, after we danced on that hill top, I couldn't get you out of my mind, I just wanted to hold you close to me."

Shoko ignored him and instead of answering him she began walking towards her home knowing he would follow.

"You can stay with me, we don't have any hotels near here and knowing you, there would be nothing that I could say that would convince you to stay at one instead of sleeping outside my bedroom window."

Logan said nothing to deny this claim, in fact he had gone eerily silent, but when she opened the door telling him to make himself at home, he did just that, he showered, made himself some dinner and even began reading a book, all without a single word to Shoko, and inside? It was killing her.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

It had been three days, three entire days of silence, Shoko had refused to leave the house until Logan spoke to her, so for three days they had been cooped up together in total silence, silence that had only just been broken when Shoko had called out Logan's name while she slept, she had been having a awful nightmare, and she woke up, sat straight up in bed and called out for Logan. As soon as she had gained some sort of consciousness she had regretted her sleepy actions, but what bothered her the most was that Logan had not entered the room. Her suspicions must have been correct; she had a feeling that he had been watching her sleep so she spoke out loud.

"Logan, I know you're there, you don't have to hide in the shadows"

There was no reply, not even a single sound, the entire house was all together too quiet, so she got out of bed, headed towards the door and the light switch she knew was right next to it. Before she had even reached the door she heard a noise behind her, she whirled around to bump right into a well muscled chest. "Logan?" there was no reply, her hands reached out to touch his chest, her breath catching in her throat as she noticed that he was shirtless, but feeling a blush rise to her cheeks she with drew her hands but as she pulled her hands away they trailed ever so softly over the hardened abs and smooth planes of his stomach. It took all her will power to suppress the shudder brought on by this sudden closeness.

"Shoko?" he asked his gravely voice whisper soft.

"Yes Logan?"

"If what you say is true, and we do have this history, why did you wait for me? What made me worth the struggle?"

Shoko wished that she could have seen his face in the darkness, seen the emotion in his eyes as he spoke, but timidly she began to answer.

"You were my best friend, you saw me for the woman I could be and not for the awkward young lady I was. You cared for me, put your life, your honor, your word, and enough coin to buy your own country behind me to support me."

Logan reached out, his fingertips brushing against her temple as he tucked her hair behind her ears "how did we meet?"

"I was a geisha, and you, a samurai" Shoko spoke her voice wavering.

"And that is where the story ends?"

"You were there that day when hank asked me, you heard what I said."

"But why did you love that samurai so?" Logan asked, his quiet voice taking on a more husky tone.

"because before I was a geisha, I was only a child with high hopes, I tended to that samurai's wounds, and there was something about him that drew me to him, he was there when I became a geisha, even gifted me with the kimono I wore, they said he must have spent nearly a years salary on it, he came around often, became my sponsor, he even paid for my apartment in the city, just so we would have some place to ourselves when he was around."

"Go on" Logan said when she had paused.

Shoko took a long moment before answering, her hands moving up to lay on his chest, "I loved that Man, he was everything to me, he had faith in me when even I had none, and when I wanted to settle down and have a life and a family? He gave up everything used all the money he had to buy us a farm outside of a little village, we were rich compared to the people there, and we always helped out the neighbors, some said that we were the reason why the village flourished"

"And was that this very village?" Logan asked as he reached behind him to open the blinds letting the moon light filter into the dark bedroom. "And we were married in front of the very Buddha statue that I waited for you at."

Shoko's only answer was a simple nod, nothing more nothing less as her eyes searched as much of his face as she could see.

"Shoko" he leaned forward to whisper into the shell of her ear "dance with me"

There was no amount of will power that could have stopped the tremble of her form, her body lit like a wild fire as his lips brushed against the delicate flesh of her ear. His hands moved to rest upon her hips, and with a ragged breath she moved her hands from his bare chest up to his shoulders, they had danced the night on the hill, when the sniper had shot at the motorcycle while they were on their way home. Logan began to lead, swaying ever so gently as Shoko leaned into him.

"Logan?"

"Yes?"

"Please stay with me tonight, I don't want to be alone."

Logan did not speak, his answer was to wrap his arms around her, holding her possessively to his bare chest, it was several long moments like this before Logan spoke breaking the peaceful silence "Shoko, I know this will sound weird, but did you ever have anyone else? Did you ever have another husband?"

"I never loved another man, I had another husband yes, but that was out of a need to help a man in a bad situation, help him to save the life of his children."

"So I was your only lover?"

"Lover means different things Logan, you were the only man that I loved, but you were not the only man that loved me."

Logan nodded softly his hand reaching up to brush through her hair "it's hard to believe that I mean that much to you."

"You were my world, you breathed life into my very soul Logan, and I don't know what I would have ever done without you."

Logan tipped his head forward stopping just short of bringing his lips to hers "I feel right, like I am supposed to be here, in this moment nothing is wrong in the world, as long as I have you in my arms." he punctuated his declaration by capturing her lips in a blazing hot kiss that left her flustered. When his lips left hers she rose up on her tip toes trying to keep in contact with him for just a moment longer, but Logan's hands on her shoulders stopped her.

"You need sleep"

"so do you Logan, you cant have gotten much in the past few days watching me sleep." in this moment though, sleep was the last thing on Shoko's mind, she wanted so desperately to stay like this with Logan, pressed against him, his arms around her in the most protective manner, and she sighed happily.

"you sound happy, I'm glad" Logan murmured as he scooped her up and laid her gently into her bed, laying her against the left side of the bed and tucking her in before he laid all the way to the right laying on top of the covers.

Once Shoko was asleep though, Logan turned still awake to look at her murmuring softly

"Goodnight my love"


End file.
